Saturday, June 5, 2010

Nervous Breakdown


Last night was not a good night. I was over at my sister's house trying to watch a movie when I emailed my hubby asking him to please call or email me if he had time. I haven't been able to get him off my mind this week and its probably because I haven't gotten a single email or phone call in almost 5 days. Now I know it hasn't been  that long to go without any communication, but this has been a very busy, stressful, yet happy week for me, and I wanted nothing more than to tell my husband about everything thats been going on around here (us getting a house and getting all the paperwork taken care of etc..) Not to mention he usually emails me every other day and calls once or twice a week, (i know I'm spoiled! lol) and needless to say I was getting very worried about him being ok. In the email I specifically told my hubby to email me before he was gonna call so I could be ready and wouldn't miss his call, and of course he didn't! Instead he called my sister's house and she didn't answer it because the number said "unknown." I didn't think anything of it at the time because I wasn't expecting his call, since he had never emailed me back. Then I get an angry email from my hubby a little while later saying he called her house and no one answered. I was devastated!! I had been trying to get a hold of him for days and then something stupid like this happens!! :( I know it wasn't Mel's fault (how was she to know it was my hubby?) but I was still heartbroken. When a phone call once a week is all you have to look forward to, its very hard not to be upset about missing it...then came the tears. I just couldn't hold them back. This deployment is really starting to take its toll on me and this month marks 8 months that my husband and I have been apart. I miss him so much it hurts, I miss his smell, his laugh, his kiss, and most of all I just miss him being here with me everyday. He is the best part of me and I can honestly say i feel like a chunk of my heart is missing while he's away at sea. After crying my eyes out for a good half an hour I trudged home and went to bed, puffy eyes and all. Its been another day almost come and gone and he still hasn't called again. Today is his birthday and I really wanna wish him a wonderful birthday, even if its just through the phone. Its just another event we've spent apart in the last 8 months...and as sad as it sounds, sometimes I wish we didn't have to celebrate holidays or birthdays...it would make missing him hurt less. I'm praying the Lord will give me strength to get through these last few months of being apart from the man I love. Now I'm off to drown my sorrows in something fattening and perhaps chocolate! Brownies maybe? Until next time, thanks for reading and much love.♥



9 comments:

  1. Uh! I hate missing calls! I'm sorry that happened to you. Please, drown your sorrows along with me. I'm currently eating popcorn and drinking lemonade....I may eat some ice cream but who knows. I really hope he gets to call or email today! Just have faith, sweetie. It will all work out for you.

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  2. Well first, Happy Birthday to your husband!
    I just want to say that I am going through the same thing right now :(
    My husband (is in the Navy too) just went away and he wont be back til almost the end of the year. 2 years ago he was gone on his birthday too. I've cried so many tears..too but just know that you arent alone. There are plenty of other girls that are going through the same thing. Being apart sucks but you will make it through! You're a Navy Wife for gosh sakes! lol.
    P.S. I just found your blog & I'm a new follower - check out my blog! :)

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  3. Thanks Sam! I'm thinking chocolate will do the trick or maybe some ruffles and ranch dip! Lol..i need to make a junk food run but I'm afraid if i leave the house I'll miss his call again! booo!! Lol for some reason the stupid ship phones won't let him call my cell, but it works when he calls other peoples cell phones or landlines. I don't know why it doesn't work but it makes it hard for me to have a life, i mean who wants to sit around and wait by the phone like its 1963?! Not me, lol! And I know I'm just being a baby but everyone is allowed to cry once in awhile, right? lol. anyway I hope your feeling better too! have fun with your popcorn and lemonade! :)

    and Stephanie:
    hey there! thanks for the sweet comment and following my blog! I am now following you too and I am loving your blog!! Have I mentioned I am also vintage and fashion obsessed!? lol...can't wait to read more!! and p.s. I tried leaving you a comment but it said only team members were allowed to comment, which I think means only you. If you change your comment settings to open id or google account users then people will be able to leave you comments, which will be lovely! :) thanks again!

    xoxo

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  4. oh no! i hate when that happens! its devastating. i know how you feel, ive missed a call from my honey and i just couldnt get over it. i really hope he can call you back soon!
    <3

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  5. Oh, dear. I've been there. I'm in month 7, and there have been a handful of times (of course the ONE time your phone is in the other room) where I've missed the call. It's heartbreaking EVERY time. Hang in there, though!

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  6. I've gone through plenty of that. I'm sorry girl. Keep your head up! He will call again soon!

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  7. Aw, sweetheart, what a bummer! I will say a prayer for you and your hubby too. I'm sure he misses you just as much if not more than you miss him. In the meantime, chocolate sounds like a fantastic idea.

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  8. Oh no! I hate missing calls! I'm so sorry that you missed his call but hopefully he will make up for it soon! Holidays/birthdays are hard without them but hopefully some kind of communication will help with it. I'll pray he will call soon!!!

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  9. I'm so sorry you missed his call. :( I'll be praying that you find strength and peace. He will call soon!!!
    'til then, may I suggest dark chocolate brownies? Stay strong, girl. I'm always here if you want to talk.

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