Monday, February 28, 2011

Woman On a Mission

I am so proud of myself for everything I've accomplished today! :) I got off work a little early and came home to tackle some important tasks I've been putting off for awhile. As most of you know we're moving next month and with that comes all the joys of having to transfer your renters insurance, schedule the move for your satellite, internet and home phone providers. I also had to go sign paperwork giving our notice to housing, and I feel so much better knowing I no longer have to worry about any of these things. I also started the process of switching my pcm for tricare, which I have been seriously lagging in doing. In short, today I've been a Woman On a Mission! ;)

I'll admit I wanted to stay busy because my hubby left today for a short underway. Even though I will see him again soon I was still pretty sad last night. I'm normally not that big of a baby when he leaves for workups but as the deployment creeps closer and closer our time seems so much more precious. It feels so unfair that he has to leave for weeks or a month at a time when he is already going to be gone for so long during deployment. I can't help but feel a little down knowing its right around the corner, but I'm trying to stay positive and have a good attitude about it all. I keep telling myself that the sooner deployment comes, the sooner it will all be over.

I know its not gonna be easy, its gonna be hard and some days it will knock me flat on my face, but I got through it once and I can and will get through it again. Its gonna be an interesting journey but at least I'll have you all along for the ride. ;) Happy Monday everyone, and I hope you all had a great day!


Friday, February 25, 2011

Happy Friday...I'm Exhausted!!

Thank Heavens its Friday! This week flew by pretty quickly thanks to the Holiday on Monday, but my poor little body can never get used to my crazzzyyy work schedule. I literally had to hit the snooze button three times today and I still couldn't drag myself out of bed on time.

I feel like Blair in this weeks episode of Gossip Girl, when she's running on no sleep and starts acting loopy. For my sake lets all hope that I can manage to get a matching pair of shoes on my little feet. ;) As Blair would say, "I think someone Freaky Friday'd me. This can't possibly be my life."
I'm working today of course, (I'm an independent woman remember?!) but I still thought I'd share with you all what I'm looking forward to when I get home...Thats bed!!! Right now theres no place I'd rather be!
Laying around, Snuggling with my sexy husband of course....
And lets not forget my new panda Pillow Pet...
He won't admit it but he loves to snuggle with him too! Lol! I've got pictures to prove it! :)  I
Hope you all Have a Happy Friday! What are you looking forward to today? ♥


Thursday, February 24, 2011

Whats My Song? Let me tell you...

Amber over at "Goodnight Moon" is hosting a great new linky called "Whats Your Song?" All you have to do is post a song that sums up how you are feeling and link up back at her blog. Sounds easy right? It is! So what are you waiting for? :)

Music has a way of connecting people and has always been one of my passions, so I'm really excited to participate and hopefully find some great new songs and artists! I LOVE this idea... and to this day music helps me when I'm sad and can make me smile after a crumby day. When Isaiah was deployed I listened to so many songs that reminded me of him, or us being together and it always seemed to comfort me when my heart just couldn't take anymore stress or sadness.

When I listen to music its not just the melody or the person's voice that I listen for, but more than anything its the lyrics. To me a song is even more special when it has meaning, and I find over and over again that my favorite songs are ones that have some significance in my life.

So this week I chose "The Girl" By "City and Colour" because I love, love, love this song and his voice is amazing! Not to mention I like to imagine my husband singing this song to me...I love this line and the lyrics are all too fitting. :)

"I wish I could do better by you....Cause thats what you deserve. You SACRIFICE so much of your life in order for this to work....While I'm off chasing my OWN dreams, Sailing around the world....Please know that I'm yours to keep, My Beautiful Girl."

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Monday, February 21, 2011

Where did the weekend go?

This weekend flew by so seemed to disappear right before my eyes! I had to work on Saturday but once I got off we went out to our favorite Sushi restaurant in Virginia Beach called "Sakura." The food was so yummy and once we were done there it was off to our new apartment complex to pick up some more paperwork and schedule the signing of our lease. Eeeekkk!! I can't believe we are moving in a month!! :) I can't wait to start saving some money and energy on cleaning, lol. Once that was taken care of we headed home and spent the day relaxing, watching movies and playing video games with our friend Jimmy.

I was so exhausted from working 6 days in a row that I passed out around 4 pm and took a 3 hour nap! I never take naps but lately my work schedule has been kicking my butt and Saturday is my day to catch up on sleep. :) Sunday the Mr. had duty so I decided I would sleep in, mess around on the computer and catch up on some errands I needed to run. I FINALLY got my hair cut and I really like how it turned out. I decided to ditch the straight bangs and go back to my side swept bangs. I missed them! :) My hair was driving me crazzzzyyy so I was super excited to finally get it cut! I also got some great new shampoo and conditioner called "Vivid Satin" by Regis. It is a-m-a-z-i-n-g!!! It makes my hair so soft and smooth...its fabulous! ♥
After that I headed to my friend Sarah's house and played with her adorable new puppy "Ajax." He is a min pin and the cutest lil guy!!

I had a blast hanging with Sarah and her pups. We even went to Buffalo Wild Wings which I love (even though our waitress was horrible!) and then we did some shopping for a crate and some doggy treats for Ajax. After all that excitement we watched "The Social Network," which I was greatly disappointed by. I just did not like it and it seemed to drag on forever. Over all it was a fun day and I managed to get alot done while my hubby had duty. :)

Today once The Mr. got home we got dressed and went out for a bit and did some shopping. I finally got my Panda Bear Pillow Pet!! Lol! I have been wanting one for awhile cause I told my husband that I need something to snuggle with while he is gone on his next underway and the upcoming deployment. Sleeping by yourself gets sooo lonely!! :( But what can I say I am spoiled and now I have one to snuggle with while he is gone, lol. Isn't it cute!?

Once we were done shopping we headed out to the apartments to sign our lease!! We got our parking decals and got all our info and I am so excited that we are gonna be moving soon!! :) I am sad that we won't be as close to our neighbors Megan and Brian because we really like hanging out with them and their adorable daughter Brooke, but since we're only moving 1 mile away were gonna come visit all the time! I am excited and happy for this next chapter in our life along with saving some of that BAH! Hoo-Yah!! How was everyone else's weekends? Happy Presidents Day!!


Left Behind...

Do you ever feel like everyone else is moving forward with their lives, all the while you are stuck in a rut? Thats how I have been feeling lately and it has been getting me down. With my 24th birthday right around the corner I have been re-evaluating my goals and priorities in life and I realize I am not where I had hoped I would be. I am so close to having my associates degree but I haven't been able to go back to school since we moved to Virginia, and lets be honest here...I should already have my bachelors degree by now.

It makes me so upset when I think about all the time I've wasted putting work before school simply so I could survive and pay the bills, especially when I have always worked for companies that expect far too much and pay far too little. When I first got to Virginia my husband was pressuring me to find a job right away, and I did. Now I work so much that we barely have any time to spend together and I couldn't even dream about going to school. Its supposed to be "part time" but For the past two months its been all day Monday through Saturday, every single week. In short it has CONSUMED my life.

To make a long story short I am feeling extremely exhausted and upset with myself for not keeping my priorities straight. Nearly every day at work parents come in and deposit money into their sons and daughters accounts because they are "In College." I always make it a point to tell them how nice they are and that I hope their kids appreciate that. Not everyone has the chance to get their education paid for and when you come from a single parent family and you aren't considered a "minority" odds are there isn't going to be anyone to pay for your education. Trust me, I would know!

Since the MyCaa program exploded, was shut down and then reopened now you only get $4,000 to use towards your education instead of the $6,000 they gave before, and you can no longer use it towards a bachelors or masters degree. So basically it is pointless for me since my associates is almost finished anyway. Sometimes life is so frustrating, and I know I need to get an education if I want to actually have a career instead of just a job. I also feel like there is a lot of pressure riding on me finishing my education because I know my husband doesn't want to be in the navy for any longer than he has to. Since he doesn't have his degree yet either I know he is counting on me to get mine.

I'll admit that makes me a little nervous and also makes me think about the future and when we will be able to start a family. Lately he has been talking about finishing his next 3 years and getting out and going to school full time. Although I would love for my husband to get his education I don't feel like its right that I should have to carry the burden of providing for us while he goes to school. He is nowhere near being finished and if I sat around waiting for him to finish that means we wouldn't be able to have kids until we were practically 30 years old!! I do NOT want to wait that long, I want to be done by then and be back in shape already! Lol So there are so many different factors to consider, and right now its all a little overwhelming.

We haven't exactly had the best of luck in our experiences with the military so My husband deploying right away, getting stationed 2,700 miles away from home (when we only lived 2 hours from San Diego and were praying we'd get stationed there) having my husband home for only a month when we learned he would be deploying again right away, and getting stuck with what hubby calls "the curse of duty section 5" which means basically every Holiday, birthday or anniversary he has duty. (xmas and valentine's day just to name a few recent ones).

So that being said, I can definitely understand his hesitation in wanting to re-enlist after his 4 years is up, but I am also thinking about stability and how we will make ends meet. I mean lets face it, I don't love my job and most days its so hard for me to even motivate myself to get out of bed and go in, but I do it because I have to. I know my hubby's job is a lot worse but at the same time, he is the one who signed up for it. : / Anyway, I think thats enough babbling for one day, but I just needed to get this all off my chest. This summer I really want to make school a priority and with my hubby deploying I will have more time to focus on school and hopefully it will help the deployment pass faster too. I don't want to feel like I am being left behind anymore, I want to move forward to a bright and happy future! :)


Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Dear Navy Exchange...You suck!!!

Have I mentioned lately how much I dislike the Navy Exchange out here? Since we live really close to the base here in Virginia Beach, my husband and I shop there often due to the fact that its close and convenient for us. Now I work a customer service job, and I have to be nice to people all day long so I understand that aspect, but most of the employees working there are just plain rude as well as incompetent! They boast about being the "Bingham Award" winner for 2009 and having the best customer service, but I have yet to see it in action.

On multiple occasions we have been charged the wrong amount for items we were purchasing, and the employees "voided" the items and re-rang them on our debit/credit cards. Unfortunately although the employees assured my husband and I that our money would be back in the accounts and available for us to use right away, that was not the case. When we tried to use our star card it was declined because the amount takes about a week for it to be deducted after being voided, and now we are dealing with the same issue with our bank account.

On Saturday my husband bought me a necklace from the NEX and the cashier charged him the wrong amount, (big surprise right?). She then voided the transaction and made my husband re-slide his card and sign for it again, instead of just doing a return and giving us the cash back like she should have. So now it has been 5 days and it is still showing both charges on our account and we are out about $250 until the NEX decides to put the money back in our account. I understand how banks work as well as point of sale transactions, because I do work at a bank after all, but what I don't understand is why we weren't given the option to just get our money back in the first place and then make the purchase for the right amount with the cash we had. That would have made a lot more sense considering now its as if my husband spent $500 on that necklace instead of $250 like he should have, and we have no idea when our money will be refunded to us.

I already called the NEX and spoke with a manager about how inconvenient this situation was, and that it was even  more frustrating because it has happened 3 times over the last few months but unfortunately for us we are still playing the waiting game when it comes to when we will be refunded our money. I was assured by the manager that there will be some re-training in the process of conducting voids, and was told by her that we should have been given the option to just return it and get cash back, and then make the purchase again with the cash in order to avoid being charged twice on our bank accounts or credit cards.

I doubt it will make a difference but at least she was helpful and let us know what to tell the cashiers in the future if this happens again, (and I have a feeling it will!). I am just praying the money is back in there by tomorrow because I need to go grocery shopping and as of now we can't touch that $250 because its still pending on our account...ugghhh this whole thing is soooo frustrating!! Have I mentioned how much I hate the NEX!!??? :<


Tuesday, February 15, 2011

We're Moving!!!

Eeeeeeeekkkk!! I'm so excited! I'm doing a little happy dance as I type this So most of you already know that we live in military housing, which means we forfeit all our bah to live here. We have a 3 bedroom 2 bathroom house and no children (as of yet) to fill it up with. Thats right, its just my Mr. and Me, so it seems pretty silly to live in such a big place and be paying this much money for it.

Along with the financial aspect of living here, I just can't seem to keep up with the house work and mowing the lawn. I work 6 days a week (every single week!) at my job and I just don't have the energy to clean such a big place. I barely have time to wash and put away our laundry or wash the dishes, much less scrub 2 bathrooms each week and keep the whole downstairs and upstairs rooms clean, along with the kitchen, and office area. Its just too much and I have been feeling very overwhelmed these past few months, so I have decided its time we "Simplify Our Lives."

After about 2 &1/2 months of researching on the internet, reading apartment ratings, looking up crime statistics and actually driving around to see the areas, we finally decided on an apartment complex thats pretty close to where we live now. We've decided on a 1 bedroom 1 bathroom apt and I think its gonna be the perfect size for us. :) Its in a gated community which I love, and there is a pool and fitness center with lots of treadmills and other work out equipment. I can't wait to be able to go running and not have to worry about anything, especially out here with this Crazy Virginia Weather that Loves to change every 5 minutes!! lol!

I am also excited to move because these apartments are gorgeous and are all newly renovated inside. :) They come with real granite counter tops and maple cabinets. The kitchen is so beautiful, I can't wait to start cooking in there! :) There's tons of storage space and counter space which our house now is lacking, (our kitchen here is tiny and only has 1 counter we can actually use for cooking.) Plus there is a breakfast bar attached to the kitchen which comes with even more storage space and makes it look more homey. I want to get some chairs for it so we can sit and eat there if we feel like it. :) Overall the kitchen has me in a daze and I can't wait to have a brand new refrigerator that actually makes ice! Sounds corny, but I HATE filling up those ice trays and waiting for them to freeze.

The bathroom has been remodeled as well and there are cabinets above the toilet so we will have extra space there too and can even have some towels in there. The bedroom comes with a walk in closet, (we all know I can't live without that!) and plantation blinds on the windows. To say the least, I looovvee it!! ♥ We also got lucky enough to reserve an apt with a deck so we can still keep our direct tv and we can get a little patio set for outside. I am so happy and anxious to get everything going and move into our new place.

I think more than anything I am excited cause this is the first place we've actually been able to pick out together and it will feel more like OUR home. The house we have now wasn't as much fun cause I didn't even get to visit the neighborhood before hand, and I didn't get to look at different units or anything. I basically got a phone call and was told we had a house and that was it. With military housing you get what they have open and theres no real room for complaining or asking if they have something else available. Which I find pretty ridiculous, considering the amount of money you pay for a place to live and all the different factors that make a house comfortable and convenient. I like the fact that we had more options now that we are actually living out here and we could take the time to choose where we wanted to live.

I had put in our application last week along with paying our security deposit so they would hold the apt we wanted, and I got a phone call last night from the apts saying we got approved!!! Yay! Not that I thought we wouldn't, but now its just one less thing to worry about and I can finally give our notice to Lincoln. I am so thankful to the Lord for allowing this to all work out and for letting us find a way to squeeze the move into our busy schedule. I don't think it was a coincidence that the apt we wanted was available on the exact weekend that we needed to move, (since Isaiah's underway schedule is so crazy) we were  limited on when we could do it. So today I am feeling very happy and blessed to say the least! I hope you all have a great day as well!! :)


Monday, February 14, 2011

Love was made for you and me...

Hello There Lovers!! Hope you all had a blissfully Happy and Romantic Day...I know I did! Ok, ok, I really spent all day inside a bank counting money, but in my mind I was relaxing at home with my love and admiring the flowers and diamond necklace my hubby got me! ;)
Since my Hubby had duty today we celebrated this weekend and went to an AMAZING steak house called Texas Roadhouse. It was insanely delicious and needless to say, we will definitely be going back in the future! :) That Foxy man of mine surprised me on Saturday with this gorgeous diamond necklace and flowers!
Go ahead...Be Jealous!! I know I would be!! ;) After I opened my gift I was all smiles and felt like the luckiest girl in the world. I love when my hubby surprises me and does something so sweet and thoughtful. ♥ 
Even though we couldn't spend the day together I did get a sappy phone call, and I'll admit it made me giddy. ♥ I also got spoiled from my "Secret Valentine" at work. She is awesome and I loved everything she got me! Take a peek...I am in Love with this blanket and heart pillow she got me...they are adorable and oh soo cuddly! :)
So even though My Hunny and I are apart today we are together in our Hearts and we still managed to have a wonderful Valentine's Day ♥ I hope everyone else is feeling as Spoiled, Loved and Blessed as I am!  Remember Valentines...Love Was Made For You and Me!!!! :) 


Saturday, February 12, 2011

Valentine's Day Wish List

Since the day of LOVE is right around the corner I thought I'd compile a list of some V-Day goodies that I've got my eye on...Maybe my hubby will catch a glimpse of my blog and take one of my not so subtle hints. ;) Or at least I hope so!! Anyway here goes...

First on my List is this special Valentines Day Pillow Pet....I know this sounds dorky but I adore stuffed animals and these things are sooo cute and cuddly! ♥
Since my Husband is leaving soon for another work up and will be gone for about a month, I am gonna need something to snuggle with at night! :) lol

Next on my list is this beautiful sterling silver "shared heart" necklace from Zales. Its gorgeous and they even have a matching bracelet! Can you say Sweet?!!
And Last but not least is this fun and flirty Chiffon Rosette dress from Charlotte Russe....its adorable! ♥

 What gifts top your list this year for Valentine's Day?


Friday, February 11, 2011

What to do when work takes over your life and your marriage?

So its been awhile since I last blogged and I can't believe its already February! This month has been going by so fast and I have so much to tell you all! :) I have been extremely busy working six days a week since January and all of February as well. I am literally EXHAUSTED all the time now! My hubby has been working so hard too, bless his heart, and he comes home and practically goes to bed at 6pm everyday. Its very frustrating since I don't get home until that time and then we are left with no time together. :(

I am still trying to navigate being a working wife and supporting my husband in his job as well. At times it is very challenging and I'll admit there are moments when I resent how hard he works because of how it affects our relationship. I have been praying about it and as usual when I am looking for answers the Lord likes to send them my way, but I don't always like what he has to say.

After being frustrated with my husband and getting upset that he was coming home and going straight to bed for almost a week straight, I finally went off and  gave him a piece of my mind. I told him that maybe he should just stay at work and sleep on the ship since he doesn't bother spending any time with me anymore, eating dinner with me or helping with chores or cleaning up his own messes at home. It is so disheartening to think that over the next year we will be spending so much time apart and what little time we have left to spend together we can't because he is exhausted.

One day I expressed my frustration through a nasty email, and got one back from my husband saying that he loved me and wished I could just "Be more supportive." Grrrrrr....this angered me to no end! Ummm...Excuse Me, but I would say after dealing with everything the Navy has thrown our way over the last year and a half I have done my fair share of being supportive. I encouraged him throughout bootcamp and sent him letters and pictures everyday telling him how much I loved him and believed in him. I was there on his graduation day, despite flying cross country, having a lay over and then getting lost for 4 hours the night we arrived in Illinois as well as enduring a snow storm the day of his graduation and the whole time we were there.

I sent him emails and wrote him sweet encouragements on facebook and my blog during his entire deployment and I moved my entire life to be here with him. I would say I have supported, encouraged and SACRIFICED a hell of a lot!! Naturally being a selfish human being and sinner, my first thought after reading his reply was, "WHAT ABOUT ME!!???!! WHEN AM I GOING TO GET SOME SUPPORT?"

Now don't get me wrong, I adore my husband but he isn't the most sensitive guy out there when it comes to how he treats me. He can be harsh and the navy has brought that out of him even more than before he joined. He has said to me many times that me dealing with him being gone is "alot easier" than what he has to go through. And I know he is right and there are different aspects, and I understand how hard they work when they are deployed but that doesn't mean it makes it any more "easier" for me to be here without him for almost a year at a time. Kissing the person you love the most in this world goodbye and saying, "I'll be seeing you..." all the while not really knowing if they will make it home safely, is never an easy task.

I can't tell you how many sleepless nights I had while he was many times I cried and worried about him when I read about another sailor, soldier, or marine who had died serving our country in this war. Or how many times I had nervous breakdowns and cried my eyes out because I missed a phone call or the phone card ran out before we could say our "good byes and I love yous." And just like I don't know everything he went through then or everything he goes through now at work he will never see how much all this affects me and our relationship. He will never see how difficult it is for me to keep "BEING SUPPORTIVE."

That night as I lay in bed I cried out to my heavenly father and asked for guidance and help. I expressed my discontentment with our situation as well as my husband's recent actions and I just simply asked for strength because I don't know how much more I can take. The next day while checking my email I received my daily devotional, and it was about none other than "Loving and Supporting our Husbands." It talked about how God created Woman as a Helper for man and than Man needs Woman very much. It is our jobs to build our husbands up and encourage them, to support and shower them with love instead of tearing them down.

Easier said than done...I am a Christian, don't get me wrong but is it bad that sometimes the Bible makes me so mad? I feel like as women we are just expected to put our own needs and feelings aside to support the fragile egos of our Husbands, and I don't know about y'all but I am very much for women's rights!  In my heart I believe we should be treated as equal partners in our relationships and that it isn't just OUR responsibility to love and respect our husbands, but that they should also do the same. We are human beings too right? We need love and support too don't we? I know I certainly do!!!!

Needless to say this area of my life is something I am still struggling with and I am having a hard time trying to be supportive. Its rather difficult when I feel like my husband isn't giving me the Love, attention and support I need in order to feel loved and happy. Am I the only woman who feels this way, or has anyone else out there gone through this too? I feel like a crazy, selfish person for resenting the fact that my husband is exhausted all the time but I can't seem to help it. : /