Sunday, July 24, 2011

Baby You're a Firework

I don't know why but music has always had an inexplicable ability to amplify my feelings. For me it's not just about the beat or the artist, but more about the lyrics...they breathe life into a simple melody and suddenly you can see it all before your very own eyes. 

I have had Katy Perry's "California Dreams" album since last summer when it debuted and loved nearly every song on it. When they started playing "Firework" on the radio I was a bit surprised seeing as it wasn't one of my favorites. I never really stopped to listen to what she was singing about. 

Friday night I was driving to my friend Sarah's house, listening to that album when the song came on. And for the first time in probably 1,000 times of hearing this song I just stopped and listened. 

It may sound corny, or even silly to some...but the lyrics to this song inspired me on that sweltering hot Friday night. The last two years have been the most challenging and emotionally scarring years of my life. I have endured more pain and suffering than I would wish on anyone. 

Milspouses don't joke when they say this life isn't for everyone. It takes a special kind of breed to withstand the hardships, challenges, and curve balls the military lifestyle throws your way on a daily basis. You have to learn to grow thick skin, adapt to changes, make new friends and learn to live in the moment and always appreciate the little things. You learn not to take any time with the ones you love for granted.

Nothing can ever be planned, because once you start planning the military decides to change the plan and mess everything up. More often than not half the bed is cold and you find yourself making dinner for one instead of two.You spend months/years away from the love of your life that you will never get back. There is always a fear and uncertainty when they deploy and you wonder if God will bring them home safe and back into your arms once more.

But somehow, (and I am still trying to figure out how) you keep going. You keep getting up out of bed every day and breathing in and out. You find a way to live, even with all the craziness the military adds into the background of your life. 

I have had to dig deep inside myself to make it through the past two years, but I've had to dig even deeper over the last 4 months. I will be completely candid in saying these back to back and early 2nd deployment have nearly killed me. I think devastated would be the right term. 

But I am still here. I am still standing. And I am NOT giving up. 
There's something inside me that refuses to let the universe win and ruin my happiness and my marriage. Just like I told my husband yesterday, "It's you and me against the world." ♥

So when life has got you down and it feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders, just tell yourself, "Baby you're a firework."
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag
Drifting through the wind
Wanting to start again

Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin
Like a house of cards
One blow from caving in

Do you ever feel already buried deep
Six feet under scream
But no one seems to hear a thing

Do you know that there's still a chance for you
Cause there's a spark in you

You just gotta ignite the light
And let it shine
Just own the night
Like the Fourth of July

Cause baby you're a firework
Come on show 'em what you're worth
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"
As you shoot across the sky-y-y

Baby you're a firework
Come on let your colors burst
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"
You're gonna leave 'em fallin' down-own-own

You don't have to feel like a waste of space
You're original, cannot be replaced
If you only knew what the future holds
After a hurricane comes a rainbow

Maybe you're reason why all the doors are closed
So you could open one that leads you to the perfect road

Like a lightning bolt, your heart will glow
And when it's time, you'll know

You just gotta ignite the light
And let it shine
Just own the night
Like the Fourth of July

Cause baby you're a firework
Come on show 'em what you're worth
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"
As you shoot across the sky-y-y

Baby you're a firework
Come on let your colors burst
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"
You're gonna leave 'em all in awe-awe-awe"


Boom, boom, boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon
It's always been inside of you, you, you
And now it's time to let it through

Cause baby you're a firework
Come on show 'em what your worth
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"
As you shoot across the sky-y-y

Baby you're a firework
Come on slet your colors burst
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"
You're gonna leave 'em all in awe-awe-awe

Boom, boom, boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon
Boom, boom, boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon


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3 comments:

  1. I love katy perry's album too.
    I really like reading happier posts from you. I'm glad you are feeling better.

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  2. Love the song and this post! You are strong girly! You got this!

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  3. Good girl! Keep fighting :) it's worth it!

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